Wednesday, March 2, 2011

El Rumor Mill: Part Deux

So many fun and exciting things going on this week that I just haaaaaad to double dip!

My sources tell me...

MLB
  • Boy howdy are those Amazin' Mets fucked. After reports surfaced that they have already borrowed $25 million from MLB last year, they are now seeking an extra $25-50 million in loans from JPMorgan Chase in order to cover "basic operating expenses". Fred Wilpon should take a cue from an NYC legend and realize that mo money just means mo problems.

  • Speaking of teams that are fucked, how bout them Cardinals! In the past month they have lost ace Adam Wainwright for the year, allowed perhaps the greatest first baseman of our generation to slip through their fingers without signing an extension, and now Chris Carpenter's hammy is feeling clammy. Hopefully the city of St.Louis has enough beer and ribs stashed away to tide fans over till three new All-Stars come along to join the team.
College Basketball
  • It's finally March and you know what that means! Time to fill out your NIT and College Basketball Invitational brackets!!! Southeastern Iowa vs. St.Cloud State has the feeling of one of those games that will be remembered forever.

  • Apparently some guy not named Jimmer Fredette on the BYU basketball team has been kicked off the team due to violating the school's Honor Code. I got good money on Brandon Davies (11.1 ppg, 6.8 rpg) having been kicked off because he stayed up past 10 pm reading Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows.
NBA
  • Newly acquired Deron Williams seems to be suffering from a strained wrist and bruised thumb and is likely to miss the Nets two upcoming games in London vs. the Toronto Raptors. Clearly this has nothing to do with his wrist or hand and everything to do with Deron Williams finally coming to the realization that Salt Lake City is way more appealing than having to live in the Dirty Jerz, White Castle notwithstanding.
College Football
  • Sports Illustrated decided they would team with CBS to preform background checks on all football players currently on the roster's of next season's pre-season Top 25. What on Earth did there six months of sleuthing uncover?!?! 7.1% of these football players had been charged with or cited for a crime, compared with the national average of 6.6%. And I am sure if they did on a study on the frats at these same Top 25 collegiate institutions, the numbers would be nowhere near this high, right?
Cheerleading
  • Video speaks for itself.

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