Tuesday, March 1, 2011

El Rumor Mill

My sources tell me...

  • Now that the trade deadline is finally over, we can now focus on its little bastard cousin: the buyout free agents. Mike Bibby has officially been bought out by the Wiz and it looks like he plans on taking his meager residual talents with him to South Beach. Troy Murphy could also end up in Miami, but Boston could also end up being his final destination. Corey Brewer was a bit of a surprise buyout by the Knicks and the Spurs, Mavs, and Celtics are all lining up for a shot at the young wing.

  • Antawn Jamison suffered a broken pinky this weekend against the 76ers and coach Byron Scott said Luke Harangody will likely be the man to step in to fill the void. The worst team in the NBA is literally doing everything in their power to be as terrible as possible. I am sure next week's El Rumor Mill will delve into the Cav's plans to go in hot pursuit after Luke Walton this summer.
  • The Yankees seem to have decided that signing aging Stay Puft Marshmallow Man Bartolo Colon may not have been the answer to the back end of their rotation this summer. Rumor has it they have been inquiring the Minnesota Twins about the possibility of prying Francisco Liriano from their clutches. The Yankees already have $206 million committed to their payroll for the coming season, which is nearly 6x more than the lowest team payroll in the league (Pittsburgh Pirates - $35 million).
  • A number of former Pro Bowlers and other dece players got cut on Monday including Clinton Portis, Tommie Harris, Kris Jenkins, and Damien Woody. Again, none of this changes the fact that a small beer is still the same size as a large beer at Qwest Field. No justice, no peace.
  • In an FA Cup match between Manchester United and Wigan, Wayne Rooney was able to avoid punishment after blatantly elbowing Wigan midfielder James McCarthy in the face. Local pundits reported that Rooney was able to avoid punishment because McCarthy refused to fall to the ground and writhe in pain like 98% of all other players would. Therefore, McCarthy is receiving the Anti-Flopalottapus King of Kings Gold Star of the week. Congraulations, James.

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