Monday, May 16, 2011

Tigers Are Out, Turtles Are In For Summer 2011

As I recounted just a few days ago, Tiger has all but fallen off the face of the golfing world due to a knee made out of a hamburger meat and a sex drive that would rival your average 16 year old nerd. In order to replace Tiger, the PGA needed a new animal to come out and take the lead charge. This turtle appeared destined for stardom, but the pressures of live television led him straight back to his lovely little home pond. We'll probably read a story about this turtle's wife chasing him with a 5-iron and him simultaneously entering rehab for sex addiction within the next week or so.

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